My In-Case-Of-Emergency Person is Leaving

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Going through the envelope of documents my sister left for me in the passenger seat of her old car (my new car), I could not help feeling a rush of emotion. She was so organized. The car was spotlessly clean, of course,  with a full tank of gas, of course. The envelope contained all relevant ownership docs, service records, transfer docs, even a traveler’s prayer. She gave me her moon key-chain too.
Today she leaves with her baby for a new life abroad. My mother, who also lives abroad, has been here for the past week, in order to fly back with my sister today.
While I am 100% supportive of the move and very happy for my sister and nephew, I can’t help but feel lonely. I know I have many cousins here who I am close enough to, but my sister is leaving.
I know we will skype and keep in touch on whatsapp, and we will visit each other when it’s possible,  but my sister is leaving.
She grounds me. She has grounded me the most throughout this past year. And not in the form of a shoulder for my sober journey woes, but as a sounding board, fellow philosopher / psychologist, clown, ocd partner in crime, and trusted friend. We talk every day even if it is just to touch base. We get each other. We understand each other’s histories, motivations and wishes. I was in the delivery room with her when my nephew was born three years ago. When I quit drinking a year ago, it was because she forced me to face the demon. While this past year has been wonderful and growth filled for me, it has been a year of struggle and frustration for her. I endeavoured to remind her to see life’s beauty and to always have hope. We are a pair. And my sister is leaving today. 😦

Update:

Thanks for all the support friends. I am doing much better. My sister and I have been keeping in contact and we are both adjusting nicely. I do miss her, especially this last week as my ex and I have been talking about our recent break-up. But I am looking at this experience as an opportunity to learn how to become more self-reliant. I’m okay. Hugs to all.

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10 comments

  1. Hi Spirit…Just sending you a hug after reading your lovely post about your sister. Having such a person in your life is lovely, but having so much gratitude is even more lovely. I know you will miss her, but I know from experience (I live overseas) that it is truly possible to stay in touch with someone you love, when the desire is there on both sides. I have a sister too (though by choice, not by blood) and we have always remained close, in spite of the distance. Some of my other friends have dropped out of my sphere, because I get the feeling they think I’ve died…I haven’t! I’m just in another time zone. (And it is the time difference, not the distance, that makes staying in touch a challenge.) I’m sure you can’t see this yet, but I think this move will help you begin to rely more on yourself, believe in yourself more, trust yourself more. And those are Very Good Things. ❤

    1. Such wise advice. Thank you. I am doing much better. I do miss her, especially this last week as my ex and I have been talking about our recent break-up. But you are so right, this is an opportunity to learn how to become more self-reliant. I’m ok.

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